Month: June 2019

I don’t even know where to start.

June 29th. Today is the day I prayed God would let me be healed, and, today, I am officially not longer a dialysis patient! The dialysis clinic nurse called yesterday and told me.

I had prayed healing would come in such a way no one could deny God did it, and He did! Today is the anniversary of my Daddy’s death. It is also the 8th month anniversary for Daniel who was exactly 8 months gestation when the placental abruption happened that started this whole journey.

I do a Bible app that reads a Psalm and a chapter of Proverbs every day. For a while, Psalm 30 has been the Psalm that I feel sums it all up for me. Well, of course, Psalm 30 was the reading for today.

I have not told many people, but I had a dream in the hospital where I was on my knees praising God, but I was dancing in praise at the same time. That’s one reason Psalm 30 stuck out to me – You have turned for me my mourning into dancing….that I may praise You. Plus the part about being kept alive so I did not go down to the pit of course! And I just love when it says, “What profit is there in my blood, if I go down to the pit?
Will the dust praise You? Will it declare Your faithfulness?” I just love this whole Psalm! (Sheol is the grave or the underworld of the dead by the way.)

Psalm 30: Thanksgiving for Deliverance from Death.

A Psalm; a Song at the Dedication of the House. A Psalm of David.

1 I will extol You, O Lord, for You have lifted me up,
And have not let my enemies rejoice over me.
² O Lord my God,
I cried to You for help, and You healed me.
³ O Lord, You have brought up my soul from Sheol;
You have kept me alive, that I would not go down to the pit.
⁴ Sing praise to the Lord, you His godly ones,
And give thanks to His holy name.
⁵ For His anger is but for a moment,
His favor is for a lifetime;
Weeping may last for the night,
But a shout of joy comes in the morning.
⁶ Now as for me, I said in my prosperity,
“I will never be moved.”
⁷ O Lord, by Your favor You have made my mountain to stand strong;
You hid Your face, I was dismayed.
⁸ To You, O Lord, I called,
And to the Lord I made supplication:
⁹ “What profit is there in my blood, if I go down to the pit?
Will the dust praise You? Will it declare Your faithfulness?
¹⁰ “Hear, O Lord, and be gracious to me;
O Lord, be my helper.”
¹¹ You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness,
¹² That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent.
O Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever.

New American Standard Version

I have written a poem about dancing on my knees – hence the title of this blog – that I will share at some point. It was one of those sit down to write and it just spills out kinda things.

Until then, thank you to everyone for the prayers and support over the past months. Please continue to pray as we move ahead with the transplant process that may God be glorified in every step!

The doctor was not there today!! This is only the second time he’s not been there as scheduled since I started dialysis. (It’s a blessing he comes every week though. Many dialysis doctors do not visit their patients weekly at treatment.)

I know God has me waiting for a reason. The verse of the day today on my phone was Isaiah 40:31: but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint!

Thank you to everyone who has prayed for our family over the last year as I know many of you have been praying since my husband left for training and I was expecting. Yes, this Sunday will be one year ago.

So much has happened since then, and so many of you have allowed God to use you to show Himself faithful to us.

Next week will also be 8 months since baby Daniel met Jesus at 8 months gestation. Tomorrow is likely to be a turning point in my dialysis as well. My doctor thinks we may have reached the point where we will be long-term for my kidney function since my labs have been pretty consistent for over a month now. (God is still in control though, and I would love to see the doc’s face when my labs improve again. He keeps saying I am not normal!)

With that in mind, I should find out tomorrow the results from a 24-hr analysis we did the first of this week to determine if I can go to treatment one day a week or…..maybe come off completely!! The doctor estimates my kidney function as right on the bubble for having to have dialysis or not.

From what I understand, if I am able to come off, we will test regularly over the next few months to be sure I am maintaining myself and can stay off till I get a kidney. (We know my kidney function is still low enough at this time to qualify for a kidney, so we are moving forward with that process.) Some of you have also said you are willing to consider giving me one of your kidneys. I will always be grateful and humbled by every offer. If you are interested, you can start the process here. More information on the process here.

No matter what, I know God is still in control. He has me in His hand, and I pray this journey will bring glory to Him and more people to the Kingdom!